Romantic relationships at university? Proceed with caution.    068

From time to time I teach a number of high achieving children, students who score in the top one per cent in their HSC results. When I speak to their parents there is one thing they agree upon concerning life at university—there will be no serious romantic entanglements. These parents, these mothers, all worked too hard and for too long to have their children’s success placed at risk in this way. One mother spoke of locking her son up until age 25.

Of course romantic relationships can be positive, can assist students to take a more mature and meaningful attitude to their study, and can help in the search for a life partner. However serious romances can also distract from study, reduce the time available, and open up the possibility of unhappiness caused by break-ups, something that obviously makes study and exams more difficult. One thing is certain: most university lecturers will not be sympathetic when a student asks for an extension of time on an assignment because of romantic problems. Indeed for academics only one thing is of interest—academic performance.

Getting on with education is actually the most romantic thing young people can do. These days inadequate or inappropriate post secondary education and training can make it more difficult to establish a home and family. In 2016 a very interesting graph was published (Australian, 15 Feb, p. 7) concerning the employment and marital status of white American men in their 30s and 40s with limited education. It seems that back in the 1970s some 96 per cent of these men were in employment and some 86 per cent were married. In 2015 things had dramatically changed. In a similar population sample only 79 per cent had a job and only 52 per cent were married. Marriage it seems is associated with income and employment prospects. Here in Australia some 40 per cent of married women have husbands who earn more than $100,000 per year. All very sobering stuff.

All content copyright—Mark Thackray—Australian Educational Services